the Air Vent

Because the world needs another opinion

Globalis Warminitis

Posted by Jeff Id on December 28, 2009

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Globalis Warmanitis is a serious disease infecting hundreds of millions. The symptoms start slowly, even one or two of the early warning signs are cause for concern. If you have a family member or friend experiencing these symptoms, act quickly and get professional medical attention. They could be the result of early onset Globalis Warmanitis. Symptoms should be treated as an emergency, as the progress of the disease is rapidly approaching a tipping point. Serious end stage physical symptoms have been reported, including; dizzyness, blurred vision, urge to paint protest signs, hysteria, hot flashes, confusion, dementia, spontaneous nudity (leading to frostbite) and eventually psychosis.

If you have any of these early warning symptoms, please contact The Air Vent immediately for guidance. All inquiries are kept 100 % public, guidance will be handled in a tough love manner by Dr. Id – B.S….M.D.

End stage symptoms include:

1. Belief in the unbiased truth of government funded science.

2. Belief that snow is a significant sign of global warming

3. Belief that drops in global temperature are falsified by the guys drawing the squiggly lines.

4. The absolute knowledge that every credible scientist believes in CO2 global warming

5. A deep warm feeling that the UN IPCC has our best interests at heart

6. Knowledge of the complex science which shows that the sun does NOT heat the earth.

7. Belief that big energy wants global warming to go away, because sales of expensive renewable energy are not in their best interest.

8. Understanding the reasons why Al Gore deserved his Nobel Prize.

9. Belief that legislation of the right kind can regulate global temperature.

10. The belief that the earth has remained at the same temperature, unchanged for thousands of years.

If you, your family or friends are experiencing any of these symptoms, take heart because Dr. Id – B.S.M.D is here to help. Together we can stop this pandemic before it’s too late.


35 Responses to “Globalis Warminitis”

  1. Tony Hansen said

    ‘…symptoms….. including….. hot flashes..’
    Would that be what one gets from hot flashers?
    (Could get hot flushes just thinking about it!!)

  2. Tony Hansen said

    Dr. Id – B.S.M.D,
    Dear Sir,
    re #10,
    Seem to have about 15 degre celsius diurnal variation where I live.
    Am I doomed?
    Yours Worriedly,
    T.

    [Reply:] There are several ways you can combat such difficulties which have been widely written in peerreviewliterachur. Humans must create their own negative feedbacks to fight such extremes. The consensus agrees that the simplest (and most cost effective) method is to put on more clothes when it’s cold. Don’t forget to take them back off when it gets warm again though, or it will create a positive feedback and make it seem even warmer than it is.

  3. Phillip Bratby said

    Dear Doctor,

    Our Prime Minister appears to have acute and terminal Globalis Warmanitis. Is there anything that can be done for him?

    Yours etc etc

    PS Most of the politicians in all our major parties appear to have chronic Globalis Warmanitis. Is it contagious or infectious? Would isolation help? Is there any antidote?

    [Reply:] Yes, it does seem to infect those who get elected most strongly. It’s as though their logic protecting immune systems are compromised by an external influence. It’s a difficult problem. Perhaps the only way to save these people is to insure they change their line of work as soon as possible.

  4. Dear Doctor,

    I was extremely concerned to see your outrageous display of cynicism. I felt it necessary to address each item of your heresy in turn.

    1. Governments are always unbiased and truthful. How dare you suggest otherwise. (remember we know where you live)

    2. Of course snow is an important driver of Global Warming. It really is so obvious I cannot possibly be bothered to explain further. Just believe.

    3. Anyone who does not ensure the graph goes up is a liar. One day we will ensure they get their just desserts too.

    4. By definition “Do you believe in global warming?” Answer yes = credible scientist. no = enemy of the world. maybe = deviant

    5. How can you possibly doubt that the UN PICC has anything other than our best interests at heart. (rememeber, we know where you live)

    6. If you had a REALLY good understanding of the science involved you would know the sun does not heat the earth at all. Believe me. I know.

    7. All large corporations only ever have the best of intentions. They would never get involved in anything that could possibly harm your economic or social wellbeing.

    8. There were millions of reasons Al Gore deserved a Nobel Prize. You probably would not be able to understand them as they are far too complex for such simple people like you.

    9. Only by massive legislation can we ever hope to contain and control individual deviance from the norm. Only when the government has absolute control will we ever be fully happy and fulfilled. Then we can send the real deviants off to camps. We have the cattle trucks waiting.

    10. The last of your dangerous delusions is even more worrying. How can anyone think the earth has ever had any form of climate.

    We really need to bring you in for a detailed interview.

    When we strap you down and shine that light in your eyes, remember Winston Smith in 1984 (George Orwell) 2 + 2 = 5. Even if you have not read the book you will soon get the idea.

    Merry Xmas and Happy New Year
    Regards
    BilloTheWisp

  5. P Gosselin said

    Why have I not seen this earlier?
    Excellent ClimateGate documentary on Finnish TV
    Must post!
    Teil 1

    Teil 2

    Teil 3

  6. Craigo said

    Dear Doctor Id

    Are chronic repetitions of phrases confined to Tourette’s syndrome or is there a possibility of mis-diagnosis of Globalis Warmitis?

    “Tourette syndrome (TS) is a neurological disorder characterized by repetitive, stereotyped, involuntary movements and vocalizations called tics”.

    Yours etc

    PS I did a thorough review of cronyreviewedpublishedpapers including Craigo08, Craigo07, Craigo et al 06 and all the authors agreed that it was worse than the models predicted.

  7. Tonyb said

    Dear Dr Id

    We are a semi bankrupt country and therefore can not afford to pay large consultation fees for our global warming advice.

    Our Prime Minister offered 3.5billion pounds towards a fund to keep the Copengahgen discussions going. As that wasn’t used I guess it is still available for other worthy co2 induced causes.

    Would £3.5 Billion be enough to disrupt your busy schedule for a few weeks and thereby give us in the UK the benefit of your vast experience?

    (The money would be paid in cash- no questions asked-just pretend you’re an MP))

    Tonyb (on Behalf of the UK Govt)

  8. [...] via The Air Vent [...]

  9. Arn Riewe said

    Recent analysis shows that most cases were preceded within the last 24 months by infections of “hopus” or “changus”.Most severe cases seem to be limited to a subspecies of humanoid known as “homo liberalis” with infection rates running 3-4 times higher than the general population. The most severe cases try to relieve their pain with injections of “cabonus creditus” serum, but this seems to have no effect on the globalis warminitis other than relieving the pain for the short term.

  10. Kevin said

    Hahaha…very nice.

  11. Bad Andrew said

    Dear Dr. Id,

    Your diagnoses are a breakthrough, and represent a giant step forward in the treatment of Dronus Clonus Algorium Robotorium.

    -Dr. Van Nostrin, The Famous Clinic In The Netherlands (or Belgium maybe?)

  12. Retired Engineer said

    Possibly related symptoms:

    Willingness to accept or even demand “adjustments”. No matter what any data may indicate, adjustment is always needed to conform to the “consensus”. No adjustment shall ever be questioned.

    All government employees, particularly Congress, possess infinite wisdom, and are the only ones qualified to determine how everyone must live. (except for those few who object to the “consensus”. They must be removed from office.)

    WAR IS PEACE, FREEDOM IS SLAVERY, IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH.

    Winston Smith (h/t #4)would understand.

  13. Mike said

    I am aware of a King called ‘Canute’, he had some problems with a similar disease ‘sycophantic improbability syndrome’. This is the feeling that if one tells the king what you think he really wants to hear, he will lavish great praise, wealth and privilege upon you and you will get access to 72 v_rgins in perpetuity and, if you are really imaginative, the king himself will present you with the most Nobel order of the barf.

    However, Canute had both the integrity and the intellect to be able to realize and demonstrate the idiocy of the claims.

    Shame about the present bunch…..

  14. JAE said

    Another symptom of the latter stages of the disease: The repetition of lies and exaggerations that are SO outrageous that only others who are suffering the final stages of the disease can believe them. Many examples here: http://www.numberwatch.co.uk/warmlist.htm

  15. B said

    Dear Dr. ID,

    I am going to airlift all of my in-laws to your office for immediate treatment of severe Globalis Warminitis.

    While you are at it, could you also treat them for acute SoCalis Liberalitis? The latter affliction causes them to form strong political opinions without any consideration for simple things like facts, logic or truth. The Liberalitis does not seem to bother them but it is very harmful to others, particularly those that have to listen to them talk absolute nonsense during the holidays.

    Signed,

    Troubled By Nonsense

  16. Greg said

    Great post and #4 is pretty funny, too.

    But now… Dr., I’m confused. A commenter in the previous thread posted a link to an article which discussed the remarks of a reputable geologist “climate expert” type person. This person stated that CO2 tracked (and caused) the heating/cooling seem over the last few hundred million years. Since he used the term “denier” I assume he’s confident in his conclusions and contemptuous of other views.

    Other geologist reports I’ve seen scoff at this idea. Can you add some clarity for the sake of my poor layman’s understanding of this issue?

  17. Interestingly, warminitis allows certain victims treatments based on mutually reassuring emails sent among them. These emails dispel some of the symptoms, but give rise to another disease, arrogantitis (unfounded and unsuppoorted swelling of the testicles), a cousin of wheelbarrow elephantiasis.

  18. alf said

    Dr. What is happening to the Arctic? It seems to be warmer then normal. Besides that my climate induced schizophrenia is progressing as predicted; thanks for the daily dose of medicine. An obsession is an obsession is an………. The warmists are coming to get me …….HELP

  19. PaulM said

    The best cure is a triple therapy based on a daily dose of
    ClimateAudit
    WattsUpWithThat
    TheAirVent

  20. Kevin Cave said

    Dear Dr Id.

    I am cured! I was suffering from this ailment for decades, but once I started reading this and other skeptical websites the symptoms rapidly began to dissipate!

    Although I am still very “green” minded (I fitted my house with solar panels, removed my gas water boiler in favour of a heat-exchange augmented electric water heater, drive a small car, sort and recycle my trash, care about true pollution like oil spills, etc. etc.), I now no longer believe in AGW.

    Perhaps my immune system has developed antibodies to this ailment? If so, I will gladly donate some of my blood for further study ;)

    Yours sincerely,

    Kev.

  21. HotRod said

    I just go to Joanne Nova’s website and gaze at her good sense and loveliness. That always helps.

  22. George said

    For what it’s worth, I thought I would pass along a link to a paper I am reading that I thought might interest others:

    Late Holocene sea-surface temperature and precipitation variability in northern Patagonia, Chile (Jacaf Fjord, 44°S)” Sepúlveda et al.

    The importance of this paper is that it clearly shows both the Medieval Warm Period and Little Ice Age in the Southern Hemisphere. It is yet another paper showing that the MWP was not “regional” and that ocean temperatures at the location studied were about 1 degree warmer than today.

  23. The carbon trading market could form up into a giant bubble, just as the housing-derivatve market did. Several forces could help produce the bubble, including grouping or packaging of “trays” of various carbon permits together. But when the see-saw of climate science tilts even further toward the exposure of massive fraud, the carbon bubble could spin wildly and burst. Then another bailout would be in order. Or not. It will be an interesting moment. Goldman Sachs, a major carbon broker, will have ex-execs stacked in the US Treasury Dept., ready to serve their “parent.”

    There is another vector. In the US (and, I’m sure, in other countries as well), state governments’ retirement funds invest enormous amounts of money in stocks. To the degree these funds trade in carbon permits, governments will do everything in their power to sustain the scientific fraud, to keep their investments safe.

  24. [...] Climategate continues!, Unscientific and unamerican, Globalis warminitis [...]

  25. George said

    Carbon trading would give incentive for maintaining carbon generated power. Imagine if a country like the US were to go completely nuclear for power generation. That would collapse the carbon trading market. Carbon trading only works where you don’t actually want to get rid of carbon energy production, you simply want to tax it.

  26. It’s true that carbon trading keeps carbon fuels in the game. Of course, governments set total allowable emissions as a ceiling. This number immediately reduces legal energy output from carbon fuel. It’s a dagger in the side of the industry.

    Nuclear-power companies are trying to get into the mix.

  27. Mark T said

    By artificially limiting supply, prices will rise drastically, forcing consumers to seek alternatives. In the interim, however, this could mean big profits for the fossil fuel industry, too.

    Mark

  28. George said

    “In the interim, however, this could mean big profits for the fossil fuel industry, too.”

    Sure, because they can make money for *not* producing anything.

  29. Geoff Sherrington said

    This is more or less OT but maybe our host might like to make a thread for it. It’s pathetic but it involves real physics.

    Melbourne Australia, population above 3 million, has a ring road, a part arc about 10 miles radius from the city centre. That gives some idea of size, before you radiate further into suburbia. The tallest building is 985 ft tall, some 88 levels of residential apartments, so Melbourne is high as well as wide.

    The Lord Mayor, infected with Globalis Warminitis, has seriously proposed that the city be painted white with a special paint that reflects heat and so helps cool the interior of buildings. Cost was not stated, as is customary.

    I have objected on talkback, noting that the reflected heat simply warms the intake air of nearby air conditioners as well as the streets outside the buildings. I proposed that on a city scale, weather heat in = heat out, more or less, and white paint has no energetic effect on the heat budget.

    Despite my entreaty to talk science before belief, and to consult with physicists, there is no indication that this has happened. The plan (which I labelled as environmental communism) seems to be alive.

    Can you folks, more intelligent than I am, please come up with some math and physics based arguments (economics optional) about whether this paint the town white has a simply-worded, fatal flaw? Please?

  30. Tonyb said

    Geoff

    I have done a lot of study on UHI-in my opinion it is a very well documented problem (in some places) that is of much greater concern than co2-i.e. it is real rather than imagined.

    UHI probably works in the favour of the inhabitants of a city in Northern Latitudes whereby temperatures are kept comfortably warmer. Not so in already hot places-which Melbourne falls into the category of.

    The Romans knew all about UHI;

    Pliny the elder 23-79AD said that it was now too hot for Beech trees in Rome compared to several hundred years earlier-this ties in very closely to observations made by citizens commenting on Nero who seemed to be creating his own uhi effect, as Matthias Ruth comments;

    ‘The relationship between the built environment and urban climate has been observed for centuries. Dating back to ancient Rome it was widely noted that ‘parts of the city became hotter (than others) during the summer…after the streets had been widened during the reign of Emperor Nero.’ To address this problem it was recommended that streets be ‘made narrow with houses high for shade.’

    So building high seems to work-although grass and trees were also observed to be effective in Roman times but were unpopular with land owners due to its inherent costs (buildings being more profitable than open spaces)

    There are various ways to keep cool;

    http://ancienthistory.about.com/od/baths/a/KeepingCool.htm

    “Even normal Greeks and Roman bought snow and ice imported on donkey trains. Few could afford private ice houses. Most urban residents bought it at snow shops. In Rome deep pits were filled with snow and covered with straw. Water melted and ran through forming a bottom layer of ice that sold at a premium. Snow could be more expensive than wine.”

    In Rome many urban women sported parasols or what they called umbracula — light cloth stretched over a wooden frame in order to provide shade.

    I am assuming Melbourne Council will not be open to the idea of subsidised snow pits or social umbrellas.

    On a serious note therefore, encouraging open spaces would work,(public and private gardens)as would creating more areas of water, appropriate building developments, dispersing population.

    I can’t comment on the science of painting buildings white-although it is notable that many Mediterranean towns are painted white or pastel colours.

    Good luck

    tonyb

  31. The (false) science of climate change is a lever for a new type of market; trading “permits” or “offsets” in carbon. And of course, millions of investors can speculate, as they do in other markets.

    However, there is another benefit for investors—as long as the market in carbon lasts. Holding permits can function as collateral in leveraging loans.

    Right now, if I hold stock in corporations, I can use it to borrow money. It’s the same with carbon permits.

    In these times, when loans can be hard to come by, any collateral is good and useful, even if it is based on the most preposterous science.

    I believe that is a hidden factor behind the initiating of this carbon-trading scheme. Private companies, individuals, and most definitely, governments want the juice to float huge loans.

    Right now, the US government is borrowing from itself in various ways to pump up the impression that it is solvent. This scam extends to the Fed, which appears to be part of the government but really isn’t.

    The US government is desperately looking for “legitimate” collateral. Therefore, we can expect, if climate legislation capping carbon emissions passes through Congress, the federal and state governments will jump hard into the carbon-trading markets. And THEN, they will use their market position to float loans.

    Yes, it’s musical chairs, and it’s bubble making, and the crash would be as severe as what happened in the housing-mortgage market, but the government doesn’t care. Their sand castles are crumbling in the waves, and they’re doing whatever they can, right now, to shore them up.

    “Oh, you’re flush in the carbon market? Wow, that’s very hip and very now. Everybody wants to reduce global warming. What? You want to borrow money against your emission permits? Sure, we can do that for you. Terrific.”

    Yes, terrific, for a little while.

    One might say the whole global warming scam was projected, so that a carbon market would emerge AND become a source for obtaining loans. Because, after all, the credit game (the loan game) is the biggest money game in the world, and has been for some time.

  32. Mark T said

    The bubble will be bigger, and the consequences resulting from the burst far more damaging.

    Mark

  33. I want to point out a few common factors in certain disease research and global warming research.

    First of all, global warming is based on the notion of a single cause: CO2. Although pro-AGW scientists readily admit there are other factors, they all say it is manmade CO2 which has pushed us over the brink.

    In the so-called Swine Flu epidemic, the culprit has been announced: H1N1. It is the cause of the illness.

    CO2 has been absurdly isolated from a whole host of other factors, in a highly complex weather system, as the single entity that has “taken the planet to the edge of disaster.”

    H1N1 has been absurdly isolated from a whole host of other relevant factors (immune function, horrendous conditions at the La Gloria, Mexico, Smithfield pig farm, where Swine Flu supposedly originated, etc.) as the single entity causing Swine Flu.

    When researchers attempt to explain how CO2 creates excessive warming, they run into contrary evidence and unsolved questions. Ditto for H1N1. For example, no standard diagnostic tests measure the concentration of the virus in the body—and it is the level of concentration (titer) which differentiates actual illness from mere passenger-viral status.

    Swine Flu case numbers and deaths don’t even begin to approach the figures on seasonal, conventional, run-of-the-mill flu. In other words, the effect of H1N1 is relatively slight. In the same way, when models and massaged temperature data are exposed as fraudulent, the picture of planetary warming becomes modest or even trivial. The effect of CO2 is slight.

    In the case of Swine Flu and global warming, alarmist propaganda has propelled these phenomena into money juggernauts. Furthermore, in both cases, UN agencies have emerged as power players: WHO and IPCC. Both agencies have globalist goals—central control of populations through over-hyped threats.

    This last fact is more apparent in the matter of AGW. But a wave of phony epidemics has placed WHO in a cardinal position to call shots on national economies and exert pressure to make governments fall into line and surrender aspects of their sovereignty.

    The SARS “epidemic,” in which fewer than 1000 deaths have been reported, globally, since 2003, cost Asian economies $40 billion. Toronto, shut down by WHO travel advisories, lost several billion dollars—and a budding effort to mount a suit against WHO faded away, as residents of the city bit the bullet.

    WHO aims to become a vast and permanent international medical infra-structure that will govern all future epidemics, and in the process allocate resources from various governments to poorer nations. Wealth re-distribution.

    Of course, ceiling caps on carbon emissions and a “kinder, gentler” USSR-type allocation of natural resources, globally, is the goal of IPCC. Wealth re-distribution.

    At the bottom of all this? False science. That is the engine.

  34. Ed Darrell said

    You referred me here when I asked for details. You know, Colbert and Stewart do a better job of delivering information than I can find here.

    They’re better at the comedy, too.

  35. Lastabwurfsysteme|Strom sparen|Energie|Energy|Strom|…

    [...]Globalis Warminitis « the Air Vent[...]…

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