UN: On the sunny side of the street

Ah well, it looks like the UN isn’t going to appoint an ambassador to outer space.  Apparently several newspapers got the story wrong.

Sorry for that guys, I wonder what made the telegraph think they knew what the UN was going to do?   hmm.

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Still warm from the presses, the UN Office for Outer Space Affairs (Unoosa) has decided to expand its role in our galaxy.

Mazlan Othman, a Malaysian astrophysicist has been given the role of first contact for any aliens visiting Earth.  Yes that’s right, the UN, seeing all countries and cultures in the world are equal, and having such deep pockets rife with US dollars, has appointed a Malaysian astrophysicist as Earths primary contact person.  After all, who better to represent Earth than an elite woman from an impoverished country with a repressive and immoral government.

Not that Mazlan Othman is unqualified, currently her work has revolved around such important issues as what Muslims should eat in space, and which way they should face while praying in orbit, serious concerns of the day.  Well it would be important if Muslim governments weren’t so generally repressive that they had functional space agencies. Now I’m not implying that Unoosa is not an important organization (bull), but really, is this where you would invest your hard earned dollars?  — you just did…..

Someone call Obama and tell him a great way to save cost would be to sanction the UN for assigning themselves ever stupider jobs.  And yes this does mean stupider is now officially a word.

They are actually discussing protocols and methods of how to handle the imagined situation.  Well thank God Allah that they have chosen genius representatives like this for first contact, I’ll sleep better knowing that humanity has put its best foot forward.  My guess is that the politicians from both species will not need universal translators to communicate, and will very likely understand the meaning of each others political ‘culture’ even if one of them is bacterial in nature.